Comments on: Time http://www.wrestleswithgod.org/2007/11/30/time/ sometimes you love God - sometimes you fight him - sometimes both Tue, 03 Jan 2012 10:05:53 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Midge http://www.wrestleswithgod.org/2007/11/30/time/comment-page-1/#comment-3893 Midge Sat, 05 Jan 2008 13:31:55 +0000 http://wrestleswithgod.org/2007/11/30/time/#comment-3893 Over Christmas, I skimmed through my diaries from the past 10 years, and one thing I noticed was that I always felt I wasn't praying enough, that I wanted to 'sort out my prayer life', but nothing's changed at all. Meanwhile, people tell you about how your life should be built on prayer, how Jesus would get up while it was still dark to pray, how Luther et al would spend hours in prayer, and they say things like 'Going a day without praying to God is like not speaking to your wife all day'. Do I have doubts and struggle with my faith and my life? That's because I'm not praying enough. 'You don't get because you don't ask.' I find time to watch TV, so why don't I read the Bible and pray instead? But all this has done is make me feel guilty and bad - not only is my life difficult, but it's my fault for not praying like proper Christians do, and I've got the luxury of spare time that other people don't, so I must be wasting it. I wonder though - maybe these famous pray-ers were specially gifted at praying as well as at doing the things for God that made them famous. Who's to say that all the other millions of Christians have had hour-long prayer sessions every day? I think most of us are called to a life more ordinary. Maybe it's more important that we bring God to mind throughout the day, to quickly remember who we're living for as we go about our daily lives, to be open to Him to guide us, so that we have the right attitude to people and work and the world. Maybe this is what Paul meant by 'pray continually'. Just as when you're with a good friend, you don't need to talk all the time to be in relationship with them. (Enjoy the silence, as Depeche Mode said.) On the other hand, I still think I shouldn't give up trying to carve out time just to focus on God alone, and ask Him about specific things, and wrestle with my instinct to take what looks like an easier option and watch TV or go online instead. In practice, I pray mostly when I'm on the train to work, as I can do it even when I'm squashed against the door or jammed between the elbows of newspaper readers, and I'm usually feeling I need to ask God to help me cope with the day ahead. I don't think God values that time any less. I need to make sure I don't just pray for myself all the time tho. Over Christmas, I skimmed through my diaries from the past 10 years, and one thing I noticed was that I always felt I wasn’t praying enough, that I wanted to ‘sort out my prayer life’, but nothing’s changed at all.

Meanwhile, people tell you about how your life should be built on prayer, how Jesus would get up while it was still dark to pray, how Luther et al would spend hours in prayer, and they say things like ‘Going a day without praying to God is like not speaking to your wife all day’. Do I have doubts and struggle with my faith and my life? That’s because I’m not praying enough. ‘You don’t get because you don’t ask.’ I find time to watch TV, so why don’t I read the Bible and pray instead?

But all this has done is make me feel guilty and bad – not only is my life difficult, but it’s my fault for not praying like proper Christians do, and I’ve got the luxury of spare time that other people don’t, so I must be wasting it.

I wonder though – maybe these famous pray-ers were specially gifted at praying as well as at doing the things for God that made them famous. Who’s to say that all the other millions of Christians have had hour-long prayer sessions every day? I think most of us are called to a life more ordinary.

Maybe it’s more important that we bring God to mind throughout the day, to quickly remember who we’re living for as we go about our daily lives, to be open to Him to guide us, so that we have the right attitude to people and work and the world. Maybe this is what Paul meant by ‘pray continually’. Just as when you’re with a good friend, you don’t need to talk all the time to be in relationship with them. (Enjoy the silence, as Depeche Mode said.)

On the other hand, I still think I shouldn’t give up trying to carve out time just to focus on God alone, and ask Him about specific things, and wrestle with my instinct to take what looks like an easier option and watch TV or go online instead.

In practice, I pray mostly when I’m on the train to work, as I can do it even when I’m squashed against the door or jammed between the elbows of newspaper readers, and I’m usually feeling I need to ask God to help me cope with the day ahead. I don’t think God values that time any less. I need to make sure I don’t just pray for myself all the time tho.

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